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Dickens, Charles

"Master Humphreys Clock"

Ha, ha, ha!'
In his excessive delight, Mr. Weller was quite unmindful of his
moral responsibility, until little Tony kicked up his legs, and
laughing immoderately, cried, 'That was me, that was;' whereupon
the grandfather, by a great effort, became extremely solemn.
'No, Tony, not you,' said Mr. Weller. 'I hope it warn't you, Tony.
It must ha' been that 'ere naughty little chap as comes sometimes
out o' the empty watch-box round the corner, - that same little
chap as wos found standing on the table afore the looking-glass,
pretending to shave himself vith a oyster-knife.'
'He didn't hurt himself, I hope?' observed the housekeeper.
'Not he, mum,' said Mr. Weller proudly; 'bless your heart, you
might trust that 'ere boy vith a steam-engine a'most, he's such a
knowin' young' - but suddenly recollecting himself and observing
that Tony perfectly understood and appreciated the compliment, the
old gentleman groaned and observed that 'it wos all wery shockin' -
wery.'
'O, he's a bad 'un,' said Mr. Weller, 'is that 'ere watch-box boy,
makin' such a noise and litter in the back yard, he does, waterin'
wooden horses and feedin' of 'em vith grass, and perpetivally
spillin' his little brother out of a veelbarrow and frightenin' his
mother out of her vits, at the wery moment wen she's expectin' to
increase his stock of happiness vith another play-feller, - O, he's
a bad one! He's even gone so far as to put on a pair of paper
spectacles as he got his father to make for him, and walk up and
down the garden vith his hands behind him in imitation of Mr.


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