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Various

"The Wit and Humor of America, Volume II. (of X.)"

I felt for these uncommon men. Think what
immortal hates must arise from these dual performances! We all like to
receive the reward of merit, but when two performances are going on
simultaneously, how are the artists to know for whom it is intended?
Applause is the sweet compensation for which all strive privately or
publicly, and to be cheated out of it, or left in doubt as to its
destination, is a refined form of the Inquisition. Fancy the sensations
of the man balancing plates on the little end of nothing,--a feat to
which he has consecrated his life,--at thought of his neighbor's
performance of impossible feats in the air! It would be more than human
in both not to wish the other in Jericho, or in some equally remote
quarter of the globe. I sympathized with them. I became bewildered in my
endeavors to keep one eye on each. If human beings were constructed on
the same principles as Janus, and had two faces, a fore-and-aft circus
would be convenient; but as nowadays double-faced people only wear two
eyes in their heads, the Barnumian conception muddles the intellect. I
pray you, great and glorious showman, take pity on your artists and your
audiences.


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